Morning ritual. Ate. Prayed. Loved. I'm staring at my screen. Screens. Unconsciously but intentionally distracted. Calls waiting. Resistant. Awake!

July 17th, 2013, 10am

It was 24.4°C with few clouds. The wind was light.

The Ate/Prayed/Loved bit was meant to be a play on cliché. Ironically though I did start my day with some hot yoga, some time with Jesus, a good breakfast, some kisses with my wife and kids. Good stuff.

In fact, on most of these kinds of days, I find myself at 5pm feeling like my day was had by me more than I was had by it. But not today.

It’s now 1:30… I resisted my email box until near noon. I did get the lazy tasks done… you know the ones that don’t cost me anything but I’m never really satisfied with. And now, the biggies are still looming. Daring me to get a life and tackle them.

Up until now, I just can’t seem to find the motivation to do the things that I know I’ll look back on and feel mattered. And, in my out of body, cry to myself to wake up, I can’t help but wonder if this ritual isn’t common to many and yet unnecessary.

Or is it? Is there something actually human in this existential lethargy that is part of being human. A necessary exhale before action. How might I be more in on the inefficient, so more flow would be available to me.

I do enjoy looking back on days knowing that I’ve been true to my commitments. Now, in the midst of not being true, I’m hopeful this little diatribe will help me jump back in. To reset. To go again…

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Dane Sanders

I'm a photographer & a writer | | Thanks! | |

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