I get to spend an hour in the morning with my daughter while her mother catches up with her girlfriends down the road.
We go to the same cafe and order the same thing - long black and a cheese scone. As soon as we get out of the car she know’s where we’re headed, waves goodbye to her mum, turns her back, and starts bouncing in my arms.
It’s strange what a child will do to you. My daughter has rounded off some of my harder edges, but in a way sharpened me. Most of the time I’m exhausted, but when I’m with her she seems to draw out a vigour, vitality and stupidity I never knew I had. She eats up my time, yet I find with less I am able to do more.
I know how special these moments are, or maybe I don’t. If I did I would present 100%. But often I’m not. My mind, too, is juvenile and immature. It flits from one thing to the next. My daughter, she lives in the moment: yelling in the cafe because she can; laughing at passersby as I hold her up to the window; pushing buttons on an old sit down arcade game, because she can.
She is the best of me.
It is often in the small and simple things where we find the answer to who we are :)
Home is where the heart is!
Autumn breeze clearing the mind
To live is not this!
He was happy he'd decided to go
I'm stuck here in a society that doesn't let me be where I need to be. Held back by the people who birthed me, by the people who learned me, by the people who will bury me when I have lived my shitty, cynical life. I have three options, One which would bring joy to me that I have not seen in a long time, one which would give me the opportunity for me to be possibly the happiest ever happy in the future, and one which would break me apart. Most likely I will have to choose the latter. The one that will break me. The society that we have created will break me, just like it has broken you without you even knowing. We sit behind our computers, reading other peoples stories because we have none to tell. I am not free,if I go out and find a drink, I get arrested. If I go to the orchard nearby, I get arrested. If I try and build a house on some land that I think looks suitable to raise my family in, I get arrested. Is this how life is meant to be? Is this how we started? Is this how we will end? This may not make complete sense, but that's because it's come right from my heart. I hate western society.
Good luck living in a world like this. I'm off to Alaska.
The farmer's beads
The weight of a memory