At first, I could only see the sky and some kind of lamp. Allocation varied, but this dose was strong.

December 4th, 2013, 1pm

It usually starts with a view of the sky. Maybe because I always wake up on my back. You would think they could at least put you in a chair or something. Maybe it adds to the authenticity of the experience.

It’s different every time. This time it was the beach. A pier stretched into the fog over the water. The light from the lamp bled onto the wooden planks below me. It was quiet. It’s always quiet in the beginning for me. I think it is the only time I ever really experience the silence anymore.

Here come the sounds, and the people. Fucking people. I used to love to see them, everyone I’ve ever known. But the novelty wares off quickly and soon becomes haunting. They don’t recognize me. Their faces are the same but it’s not them, just empty vessels. It is not my favorite part of this, but that’s not why I am here.

I am looking for something. Something that the dose is supposed to help me find. Something that could save us all.

Adrian and David Wade said thanks.

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Attempting to fathom the infinite universe.

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