The call of the void.

December 15th, 2015, 8am

These thoughts are starting to consume me.

Good things are happening to me but all I can muster is self-destructive behavior. A whole lot of paranoid ideation.

Walking on the street? Jump in front of a car. Driving to pick someone up? Run into that pole. Meet family for dinner? Throw myself down the stairs.

These thoughts are normal as long as they’re not acted out - and they’re not. But the fact that I’m having them in a 9-1 thought-ratio is a problem.

My new year’s resolution is to think more positively. Using words and tones that exude happiness instead of utter dreariness. It is one of the main things holding me back as a person and I would like to start this new chapter of my life with full confidence.

Here’s to another great year!

Porter said thanks.

Share this moment

Rosana Ng

Maybe I'm mental.

Other moments in New York

Create a free account

Have an account? Sign in.

Sign up with Facebook