I lost my first love, and he probably will be the only love.

September 30th, 2015, 1am

He hurt me, then I got through it, forgetting the pain that was caused. It couldn’t have been that bad. Then I met you, you became my world for the next 1 year and 6 months, and 4 days. From Macy Gray signing my chest right over my heart that I thought you would preserve for the rest of my life. Fast forward and our love is so strong, our friends desired the bond you and I held.

I still think of your beautiful brown eyes that formerly would turn and stare into mine. The way you emitted your love for me through just that moment, that split second was what kept me going, it kept me wanting to breathe every day. The first day you were gone, I hardly remember. The pain in my chest was so great, I don’t know how my body physically could take the absence of your presence, of your voice, just the joy that you filled my heart with, gone for eternity……

I never have understood how one can move on from one human they truly loved. Love is unconditional if it true, it never ever will go away until the heart gets a break an unconditional break, one that never comes back.

I cannot speak for anyone else, because I only am sure of my own existence but, I will say if that is how love feels, I’d rather get it from anything other than a human, because as I’ve said time and time again, people are unpredictable and that breeds fear which breeds hate. I don’t want to hate, I want to love.

Pushkar and Cody said thanks.

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Henk Holveck

I'm just a twenty-something androgynous human. Taking everyday to learn and better myself.

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