Now, I’m not normally one to eat this sort of thing. A quick survey of any of my social media feeds over the past 10 (or more?) years will testify to my annoying tendencies to document my meals—and more often than not, they are either drool-worthy or at the very least, healthy.

Tonight, that is not the case.

Tonight I am eating a microwaved Don Miguel HANDMADE Spicy Beef Burrito (With Beans) out of the vending machine here at the hospital, where my mother has been staying for the past 6 days. She had a medical procedure performed today, and this was the third time they attempted it, as the first two times—well, they didn’t go so well for anybody involved, especially for my Mama.

Mama is a small woman in her 70’s, she stands 5 feet tall but these days she isn’t doing much standing, other than walking to the bathroom. Her health problems have kept her from eating or drinking much ovet the past month, so she looks as small and as sick and as weak as I’ve ever seen her.

Needless to say, the first two botched attempts at the procedure took a lot out of her, and while the third time was a success (fingers crossed), it’s left her in a lot of pain and general discomfort, so I’ve been here since 10 this morning. It’s now 10 at night and the hospital cafeteria is closed and this is Los Angeles, so nothing is open late, and the only thing that I can think of that delivers is Domino’s.

So here I am, with my microwaved burrito.